We all have to face the facts from time to time, and that may mean asking yourself if your parenting strategy sucks. Parenting is tough, but when you have the wrong strategy, it can really suck. Here are 6 parenting habits that may indicate if your parenting strategy sucks!
I can truly tell you that as a parent of three kids, I have questioned whether or not my parenting strategy just down right sucks. I am guilty of more of these than I am not with gathering whether or not it does. A a mama struggling with anxiety, I tend to be really hard on myself more times than not. My saying is always to “pick your battles”. I am sure that a lot of other parents are right there with me. Whether you have one child or multiple, there are times where you just feel like you want to throw in the towel on even having a parenting strategy.
When you throw in having another parent in the picture, there are so many times where you say one thing and they say another. I have gone through this one multiple times. There are a few telling signs that your parenting strategy just sucks, and I am right there with you!
6 Reasons Your Parenting Strategy Sucks
1. You don’t follow through on what you say. This is a tough one for parents. You don’t want to punish your kids, but not following through on the consequences you say only teaches your children how to get away with things.
This is definitely the rule that is broken most often by me as a parent. I threaten and threaten again, but the follow through is rarely there.
2. You give into your kids demands. No parent likes to hear the screaming tantrums of a child, but you can’t give in. Giving in only shows them they can get their way when they throw a fit which means more fit throwing will happen.
When I mentioned above to pick your battles, that doesn’t mean concede to every little thing that your child wants, but when they want to wear that crazy outfit and it’s driving you crazy, just let them.
3. You do everything for your child. At some point your children will be adults. They will have to figure things out on their own, pay bills, and clean up after themselves. Don’t be a servant to your kids. Make them responsible by giving them chores and responsibilities.
I try and try to make my kids into independent little people, but they still come to me for things that I know they can do. This one I can be proud to say that I do not give in on. You can put on your own clothes and pick your toys up. I know that you can 😉
4. You compare your child to other children. No one is the same, and children are just little people. If you compare them to other children, they will eventually give up trying.
This one can be tough! If you are part of play groups or your child goes to school, don’t compare. All you have to know is your child is their own individual and will do things at their own pace.
5. You don’t set boundaries. Many parents struggle to set limits and boundaries. Though it may seem harder, children actually like having limits and boundaries. It makes them feel safe and secure.
In this house, we definitely have boundaries set. As the parent that is here most of the time with all three of the kids, my boundaries can get trampled on a lot of the time. Don’t get discouraged with this part of the parenting strategy and just hold firm.
6. You are being a friend not a parent. All parents want their kids to come to them and talk to them, but you are still the parent. If you want your child to listen to you, you have to set the standards straight and be a parent not a friend.
I had my son when I was just barely 20, so this is a rule that I have definitely had to work on for myself. With my girls it is different. I had 4 plus years of experience with this parenting strategy thing going when I had both of them. Being your child’s friend more than their parent is not going to let them know that you mean business.
Just because your parenting strategy sucks doesn’t mean you are a bad parent. However, if you find your parenting strategy sucks, you can make steps to change it and ultimately have a healthier relationship with your child. I know that I am learning on working on myself more and more every day!